Raising Children in the Modern World
Dearest Brother in
How please I am to hear from
you! I often thought about you. Do you recall that I owed you money for your
books? I have no idea how much, do you
I suspected that you had not
married. It is awful to say, but I told my son, Don, who is 36 years old,
something I never thought I would ever tell anyone. I congratulated him for not
Because you have been wise enough to
listen to God’s calling to remain single, rather than jump into marriage even
if everybody was doing it, I can tell you what I have told some religious.
You have chosen the best part, Him,
the one and true Love! Non other can
compare! Look at the advantages, even in this world... You sacrificed having
children, true, but you will never have the guilt that you have brought into
the world unhappy, or miserable children.
You will never worry about them being in the “wrong side” of
spirituality. And I assure you that
worrying about one’s children is exhausting, and an on going dilemma! On the
contrary, you can now have time to devote to help other children, your input
into God’s plan, and help God’s children who are so needy, in so many ways!
Because you refused to marry a girl who put you above God, He is now surely
putting you first in His plans.
You have sacrificed human love, oh
but for much greater! You will never
have a divorce. You never worry about your wife cheating on you, ruining you,
leading you to wrong doing etc. No, you
have chosen the safe way to salvation, the Love on which you can depend on, no
matter what! Congratulations for having
made such a wise choice!
The Fruits of Brother Gino
We have been through the worst
nightmares ever imagined since I last corresponded with you. You remember our
son, Rich, who was in the Oblates in San Vitorino, Italy? Well, after
having been scandalized, he left the order.
He could have been an excellent priest if he had been properly
guided. He was known to have excellent; moral, dedication, values, and a gift for
preaching. He was so smart that he came
out second in a class of 140. These
seminarians came from all over the world, some had master’s degrees of all
kinds, and spoke many different languages.
In spite of the fact that Marc knew nothing about Italian before he went
to Rome, and that all exams were in Italian, he nevertheless, came out with
highest honours! I think it was a great
loss for the priesthood. When he went in, we were honoured, but I had told him
that he had to make sure because he had to be a good priest or not at all. When
he came out, I have to admit that we were relieved because we realized he would
have had to swim upstream all the way!
Letting God Choose Our Way of Life
He later unfortunately, rushed into
a marriage, as he really thought he was doing God’s will. He wanted a religious wife, so he thought
the best place to get her would be at church.
He met this girl, about his age, in the church choir. They were both going to the university. She APPEARED to be a good person. Imagine
she even read her breviary, hun!
Priests don't even do that anymore. Anyway, it must have been just a
show to impress Marc, and it surely worked!
As soon as she got married, she
stopped going to university, and tricked Rich into getting pregnant, although
she had agreed to follow church approved methods to wait until they would be
finished their studies. Her best girl friend was later known to be a lesbian.
They lost two babies, one of four
months and one of three. The first one should have only lived three months, but
he was their first child and the parents just could not let him go. They would
revive him so often. Although he was our first grandchild, I thought it was
terrible to force him to live when he was at the end of his little life. Finally, he just could not hold on any
longer, he was too week to keep on struggling for breath.
The parents took it VERY hard. So
did we! I had gone all out decorating my room with baby decorations, the crib,
and numerous number of toys filled my wardrobe, for when they would visit. Their second son lived, but afterwards, they
lost another, and they were crushed!
His wife who was not working,
frequented clubs until 1 and 2 in the morning, almost daily, while Rich baby‑sat
their young son. She gambled his hard earned money, spending hundreds of
dollars per week, and she went out mostly every evening, smoking and gambling.
At the end he had to declare bankruptcy.
Her girl friends were ALWAYS more
important to her than her husband, or her marriage... She was not willing to go
see a marriage councillor, or to change in any way. At the end, he got cancer
and knew he had to leave her, for his health and sanity. Now, he is shacked up
with a widow who has two children. His son, Nathan, now 9, lives with his
mother, but spends much time with Rich and new “family”. They are all good to
Nathan, but it is a most unfortunate situation. Nathan is brought up as a little pagan... At nine years old, he
still did not make his first communion. It breaks our heart to see our
grandchildren growing with no spiritual support. In their teenage years, when
the going gets tough, they will have nothing spiritual to rely on.
Marc could easily have an
annulment. We always strongly believed
in “Marriage until death.” However, in this case, his wife lied to him, and to
the priest, when they were taking a course on preparation to marriage. She lied about a serious matter. However, Rich is making no attempt to get a
an annulment because he has lost faith.
The Fruits of the Army of Mary
That was bad, and we shed many
tears, but much WORST happened to our daughter! Do you remember that she was in the Army of Mary? Well, it is a long story about how we
finally got her out. Some day I will
write about it. She married the worst of possible persons, from hell, a homosexual
pedophile who sexually abused our two little granddaughters when they were
only 2 and 4! (Maybe before, we will
We sometimes live on pins and
needles. As soon as a father descends to such evil actions as to sexually
molest his own child, his rights should be terminated at that very moment. He
does not act like a father and should not be considered a father, but a thief
of the most despicable kind. He robbed his child of her; emotional life,
dignity, innocence, health, self‑worth, respect, self‑esteem and
her very youth. For all this, he gives her feelings of aggressions, violence,
rage, anger, revolt, hate, guilt, depression and self destruction.
Such a father does
NOT deserve rights! This is worst than any of the most terrible sickness,
health problems, or even death. Many do
not understand the damage done to an abused child, and I am convinced that most
people have no idea of the deep scars and trauma it causes. Every day, we see
the pain and suffering those children are going through. We witness their
frustrations, their aggressiveness, the violence, self mutilation, and the
perversions... It is totally heart breaking!
I always maintained that the worst crimes are those done to
children, now I am all the more convinced of it. The worst above all is the
abuse by the father!!! It is totally discouraging to constantly have to fight
and pay to protect the children. The law STINKS!
Many do not realize the seriousness of this crime. The
perpetrators MUST be punished, even, (and more so) if the abuser is the father
because it is all the more destructive!
It totally turns their world upside down because the very person who is supposed
to protect them is the one abusing them.
The father is a pivotal person in their life and is expected to love and
protect them and want them happy. But
abusing his own children is such a mental confusion for them that they cannot
differentiate between; sex, love, good, bad, normal and abnormal. It is a total mental, emotional, and
Governments of Satan
A mother can stop a child from
seeing a stranger, a teacher, a minister, a priest, a doctor, a bum, or
anybody, but when she wants to protect her child from the father, it is like
fighting against the devil himself! Just because he is the father, this gives
him rights. What kind of a crazy world do we live in?
I find it very
difficult to accept the fact that our grandchildren live in a pervert world.
Children are not encouraged to read anything spiritual, and good children’s
religious books are difficult to get, especially French ones. As a matter of
fact, it is difficult to get anything without violence and sex. Even children’s
movies are filled with immodesty and violence. Much is geared to train their
young minds to accept sex as a positive tool to enhance their situation as
though this is a normal and natural way
of life. Of course if they have been
abused this pervert situation simply endorses the perversion as though it is
acceptable. Our granddaughters do not
watch TV now, but it will not be long before they do.
I was severely
reprimanded by my daughter when I told our granddaughter (6 years old) about
the crucifixion. Our daughter then stopped me from taking her children to mass
and took away the religious books I had given the little ones, because there
were some picture of the crucifixion, and of Adam and Eve. I had also told her
about the devil disguising himself as a snake. Of course, today, this is a serious
taboo subject. And to support the mother, the sitter was scandalized that I
would have mentioned such “horrible things” to the children.
Unfortunately, Carol is
a strange child. I never in my life, heard of playing crucifixion, which is
what she apparently did with her sister afterwards! When we were young we knew
more about Christ crucified, and at a much younger age, nevertheless, the
thought never crossed our minds to play this out! I recall playing mass with my
brother. Of course, we had not been sexually abused... This is the core of the
Carol is intense on
violence, she will stare at a picture of Christ on the cross, and leave all
other nice pictures aside. I am sure it is not related to spirituality. She seems to have a fixation on anything
which causes pain, to herself, and to others. For this reason, I believe she
needs religion all the more, in order to help her to know and believe that
there is hope and Devine Love.
What I dislike, about
the situation, is that without giving consideration to the fact that, I (or
anyone else) could have predicted that Carol would react this way, it is so
easy to jump to conclusions and blame religion.
Since October 2000, we
have lived our worst nightmare and it is ongoing... Carol 6, and Dan 3, had not
seen their father since May 2001, at which time we had no doubt he had molested
them sexually. The police, doctor, social service and the psychologist were
His last telephone
conversation in May 2001, he told Carol, his then 5 year old daughter, that if
she talked, the police would put her in jail.
She was so agitated and scared that she did tell, thanks God! She had been having nightmares and her
behavior was so outrageous! She has
done much progress since.
Unfortunately, the law
does not protect the children. Just because an abuser is a father gives him
license to continue his destruction. At the end of December 2002, he saw the
girls for three hours under the supervision of the social services. Since then,
the beautiful progress they had accomplished in the last year was ripped away.
The language and sexual behavior came back in a most obvious and disturbing
I believe that much worst than
physical death is going on now. Mental torture, psychological affliction, and
death of the soul is much worst! I would gladly give my grandchildren to God in
death as martyrs, rather than go through this spiritual extinction. Of course,
I do not tell my children how I feel.
I thank God for having
taken to heaven, two of our grandchildren (three, and four months old.) We
found it painful when it happened, but nothing compares to this! I welcome
death and sickness as the will of God, but this is evil from hell! It is very
difficult to deal with it as we live on pins and needles not knowing how it
will turn out. Notwithstanding, we are well aware that it is a life long
problem that will most probably escalate as they become teenagers, unless
Prayers from Fatima
and the World
I am telling you all
this because I want to assure myself of your prayers. Please, would you
consider to adopt them as your spiritual children, to keep them in your prayers
always, even after you have reached your eternal home?
Since March 2001, we
have been in the red financially, to help our daughter. We have now stopped
helping her financially as we cannot continue. We continue to baby sit when the
children are sick, which is very often, and to drive them to their many appointments.
We assist her as much as we can. In
spite of the stress, she will have to manage financially, without our help, as
we cannot sell our house. We tried for
almost two years but it is not a sellers market. We were willing to lose $20,000.00 dollars, now we figure, it may
be for our own protection that we cannot sell, so it is now off the
market. We had prayed so much! But it
is sometimes so very difficult to know what is the will of God.
Our daughter, paid
many thousands for lawyer’s fees, but is unable to get a divorce because the
law says that the case of the children must be settled first. To me, this is senseless. Two people divorce
each other. A couple does not divorce the children. When I mentioned this, I
was told that this is the way it is because the children fall in, “with the
separation of the goods, and the effects of marriage.” In other words, in my
view, as far as the law is concerned, children are nothing but objects.
This means that our
daughter will be living in sin as the divorce drags on! She has a boy friend, a
very good person, a Catholic (not 100%, but better than most young “Catholics”
of today...) He will not live with her
until they can get married, however, they do pass some week-ends together... He
is an excellent person, he does not feel right about the situation, and he
would like to marry her. Lucy obtained her official separation in 2001, and her
annulment, “without reservations” last Fall.
However, in order to marry in the Catholic Church, she must have her divorce.
I am convinced that if she could get her divorce and marry,
and if the father could be totally out of the picture, the children could fall
into a loving and normal pattern, which would help their self esteem and
spirituality. I know God can do it, however, it will take more than my prayers
to solve such a situation because my prayers do not seem to be too powerful.
I do not know if it is
true, but I once heard, or read, that it is more powerful to pray for someone
else than for our self, and others have more power to pray for us than for
themselves. Do you think this is true?
You are in a perfect
place to entice Our Lady to lend an ear to your prayers, please ask her to
assist us in this evil mess, please!
One question I would be
interested to have the answer is the following: Holy water used to be blessed
with a much longer ceremony than today, including salt and with the exorcism
prayers. Is today’s blessed water as
powerful? I never used blessed salt, I
thought that was only for the church. Does it hold the same power as holy
I wrote, what I think
is an excellent religious book, in English, which includes all what a person
needs to know to be saved. This was
written for my children, grandchildren, nephews and nieces. If you want, I can send it to you. I think it is rather interesting.
I use to make one
novena after the other, and I had so much confidence. I could not believe that heaven would have permitted visitations
AGAIN! Now my husband and I are both
worn out, we lack energy and hope. My
prayers have dwindled down to almost nothing.
One ritual I hope
never to abandon, is the blessing with holy water. Each night I spray holy
water on friends, relatives, the pope, the sick, the dying, all those who
suffer, those who work for Christ, I baptize those dying without baptism and
the aborted, etc. It is a long list of intentions. I sometimes lose energy, and neglect my prayers, but this is one
thing I keep on doing, no matter what. You were, and are always included:
I pray for conversion,
sanctification, and perseverance, as I deposit all of you in the chalice at
each mass I assist. I also pray that Paul
be erased from our minds and from all our lives.
Your little sister in