Do Not Treat Sex Commonly

Sexual Outrages, Sexual Sacrileges, Sexual Indifference, Adultery and Fornication


The first lesson in treating sex commonly is not calling it sex.  The very word sex is degrading for a creation of God.  The proper use of the word sex as regarding male or female refers to what sex - the male sex or the female sex.  In the case of plants the sex chromosome that produces reproduction or in the case of animals the method of reproduction. So sex always means what part one plays in the reproduction of the world.  In humans,  if the "act of love" is reduced to "Sex" then love is lost and the great creation of God - the sacrament of love - is treated commonly and sacrilegiously on the level of animals or plants.  We have misused the word so much in the past that the dictionary now has it as a verb.  


Prophetic Words of Humanae Vitae

 Thirty-Five years ago Pope Paul VI predicted that evil would follow contraception - the weakening of the family, of the ease with which conjugal infidelity would be introduced within the family, of a general degradation of customs and this is, in fact, what has happened.  Human fragility needs to be reminded of the moral order, to be sustained in the struggle against disordered passions, especially in the case of youth.  The Pope anticipated the disaster it would mean if the public power, especially when it is not subject to moral exigencies, were to make use of these contraceptive methods to undermine the sources of life.  This is what has happened in many countries where today there is talk of a demographic winter.  Contraception has allowed people to treat sex commonly and its beauty has degenerated to nothing more than another daily task like eating and drinking not just among the young but among almost all, married and unmarried peoples. 

Errors and Irreverence


Even though Jacinta of Fatima said (quoting Our Lady) that more people go to Hell for sins of the flesh than for any other reason, I am daily running in to people who have no conception of this great sin.  It is a great sin in the same way that receiving the Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity in the Eucharist commonly or with irreverence is a sin.  If it is a sacrilege and a great sin, to treat the greatest love of Christ, the Eucharist, without proper thought, love, and reverence, then it is a sin also to treat the act of love without proper thought, love and even reverence.   


The Angel of Fatima taught us to pray for sins against the Eucharist - outrages, sacrilegious and indifference.   The same can be said of the act of love that is said of the Eucharist.  The Eucharist is Christ's ultimate expression of His Love, in that it required His death on a Cross, and then it unites us, flesh of His flesh, blood of His Blood and bone of His Bone.  It makes us a cell in His Body whereas His blood flows from me to all the other members of His Mystical Body and then from them back to me, making me more of a brother to the members of the Church than I am to my own flesh and blood.  Gal. 3:28, Eph. 5:30. 


In the same way the act of love unites two people into one body and they are no longer two but one, so also the Eucharist unites us into one body, His Mystical Body, the Church.  As Paul says, "this is a great mystery, I mean in reference to the Church."  Eph. 5:32 and in the entire chapter 5 of Ephesians Paul explains how husbands and wives should be like the Church and how the Church is like a good marriage.     


Just as receiving Communion properly is a great grace, the greatest of all graces,  so also the act of love can be a great grace and the greatest of our expression of love. But just as the greatest of all Sacraments if used improperly can become a great sin, so also anything that God created and used wrongly can also be a sin.  Everything God created is good, but it is the misuse of it that is sin.  Soil is good and the world could not have food without it, but soul out of place is called "dirt".  The misuse of the good God created is called "sin".  




Almost everything we have and enjoy requires some preparation in mind and body.  Even breathing is not done until we come forth from the bodily growth in the womb of our mother.  Solid food requires some growth in body and some education by our mothers.  Contrary to the false claims of Dr. Kinsey, children have no sexual attractions until many years of growth.  Then they have a built in knowledge that the misuse of this attraction is wrong.  Today through false propaganda, false science, sometimes even from parents themselves, and through the pressure of other children, children are loosing this naturally born knowledge.


The reception of the Eucharist requires Baptism, the teaching of the Faith of Christ and the Sacraments, the teaching of the true meaning of the Eucharist and then being tested that you have this knowledge and faith before First Communion.  Then one must clean the soul with First Confession.  One must dress properly and walk up to the Lord of the Entire Universe with fear, love, reverence and trust.  We are naturally attracted to God but we cannot treat Him commonly.


Likewise we are naturally attracted to the opposite sex but we know from birth that we cannot treat this attraction commonly without preparation in mind, body and spirit.  When this natural attraction is treated commonly and without the same reverence of the reception of the Eucharist then all kinds of problems enter into the world.  Like gluttony, when the sex drive is not checked in a society then it will evolve into perversion that becomes so extreme that God will want nothing more than the entire destruction of that society as in the case of Sodom and Gomorra, Gideon, the Philistines (1 Kings 13) and Pompeii.    


Sexual Outrages


St. Chrystostom said that "It is better to cast your seed in the belly of a whore than to cast your seed on the side of the road."  Why would he say such an outrages thing?  Sex with a whore is a major sin that will put us in Hell for ever and ever, and yet St. Chrystostom says this is less a sin than - masturbation, Onanism (contraception Gen. 38 and 46) homosexuality or any unnatural sexual act. 


The words heterosexual and homosexual are 20th Century words created by pro-homosexuals. What word is used in the bible for homosexuals?  The word in the Bible for homosexuals is "effeminate".  That is why Lucia in her book "Calls from the Message of Fatima" quotes St. Paul in 1 Cor. 6:6-10 "neither the immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor thieves nor the greedy, nor drunkard, nor revilers, or robbers will inherit the kingdom of God."  But, in fact, the word in the bible is "effeminate" not homosexual.  I have counted 32 places in the bible where the word "effeminate" is used and called a great sin.  Paul in Romans, Chapter One does not use the word but goes on for 32 paragraphs describing how much God hates the sin of homosexuality. 


For those who are not effeminate but accept the effeminate as a way of life, there sin is just as great.  Rom 1:32, 1 Tim 5:22.  And to those who say that these people do not know what they are doing and therefore God will not judge them harshly, read Jeremias 17:9-10


"The heart is perverse about all things and unsearchable, who can know it?  I  am the Lord, who search the heart, and prove the reins, who gives to everyone according to his way, and according to the fruit of his devices." 


In other words, God does not judge according to our own heart but according to His Commandments.  The commandments are not what we think but what we do - our ways and the fruits of our life. 



Sexual Sacrileges


A Sacrilege is a sin against a Sacrament and Sacrileges are considered the greatest of all sins.  Marriage is a Sacrament and the Consummation of a marriage is the act of sexual intercourse.  The law states that consummation must take place in a human manner which is not forced, is not unnatural, and is free and loving between the two parties.  Pope Alexander III decreed that consent brought a marriage into existence but that consummation made the consent absolutely indissolvable.  Consummation then must be part of the marriage but it must be the free consent of both parties.  It must be because of the love of both parties.  And there must be fidelity to the marriage until death.  Divorce then is not possible in a true marriage.


In the writings of Anna Catherine Emmerich we read of some women who came to Christ complaining that they could no longer stand living with their husbands, and asked Him for a decree of divorce.  Christ took a glass of milk and a glass of water and poured them together in another glass.  "When you can separate the milk and water from one another, I will grant you a divorce." 


Paul says that what God has put together let no man put asunder.  God protects the marriage with His laws, making it a mortal sin to even look upon another's spouse with lust or desire. 


Of course Our Lady of Fatima said that many marriages are not made in Heaven and if not made in Heaven then they are not marriages.  However, when we consider ourselves to be the judge of this, we take the place of God, who alone is judge.  We must then consider that all marriages are made in Heaven unless the Church says otherwise. 


The reason that adultery is such a great sin is that is violates the oath of love, the oath to God, the oath to the Church and the oath to one another. There are those who think that sex outside of marriage between two people who are not married as not a sin.  These people fail to understand God's law. 


In God's law is the word, "Fornication", which is any sexual act outside of marriage in physical fact or even in the mind. 


"Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are fornication, uncleanness, immodesty, luxury, Idolatry, witchcrafts, enmities, contentions, emulations, wraths, quarrels, dissension. Sects, envies, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like.  Of which I foretell you, as I have foretold you, that they who do such things shall not enter into the Kingdom of God."  Gal 5:19-21 


Take note that the first of all the sins that will keep you out of God's kingdom is "Fornication", which is any sexual act outside of marriage.  Paul does not have to use the work "adultery" in this list because fornication covers it also.   Again Paul says the same of fornication in Eph 5:5 and in 1 Tim 1:10.  Paul says that any form of Fornication is a sin against one's own body.  1 Cor 6:18 and that Fornication is so bad that if a man or woman's desires were so strong as to fear even the possibility of Fornication "let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband."  1 Cor 7:2 


Speaking of the sins of the Jews when Moses was up the mountain Paul says, "Neither let us commit Fornication as some of them committed Fornication and there fell in one day 3,200 people."  1 Cor 10:8 


I hope if I have not convinced you that any form of sexual acts outside of marriage are grave sins, at least the Bible will convince you. 


Sexual Indifference


For one like myself who goes to the Sacrifice of Calvary each and everyday and stands at the foot of the Cross each and everyday and receives the Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity of my God each and everyday, it is hard to not treat this great Mystery with a common indifference like the other daily chores of life.  But this would be a great sin on my part and so a great deal of thought and preparation should go into each and every Mass and each and every communion. 


To avoid indifference in receiving Communion with Christ, one should prepare for this union when he or she wakes up in the morning, thinking only of the fact that he or she will have a union with the greatest of all love, God, Himself.  Acts of Love should be given to the Heart of Christ from morning on to the time of the Mass.  At mass one must dress to meet this great Love and his or her eyes and mind should be on nothing else but Him.  A word of love should come forth before the Mass and a look of awe should be on one's face at facing the first appearance of this Love in the Mass.   At the moment this great Love and you unite into one body, one soul, one flesh and blood, your thoughts should be on Him and nothing else.  You should try all you can to give Him your love, knowing all the time that you can never give as much to Him as He gives to you.  After you sit in awe of the great union of love that you and He had.  


In the same way the act of love in marriage should be treated somewhat the same way we should treat God in the Eucharist.  If we treat God commonly in the Eucharist, do we treat sex commonly in our marriage?  


Do we love from the moment we wake in the morning, doing all we can to show our spouse, which is our own body, how much we love he or she and how much we like just being in their company?  Do we avoid unnecessary conflicts and reconcile quickly when they happen?  Do we show with just a look in the eyes that we love?  Do we do little acts of love throughout the day that show we are living the promise we made in our marriage vows?  Do we prepare for union with our love with a proper reverence and awe for such a great act of love, in the way we present ourselves, both physically and mentally?  When we are united in love do we think of the love we can give or the love we can take? 


Arranged Marriages


Some people argue that in the past many marriages were arranged by families and therefore love had nothing to do with it.  How then can two people love if they never loved in the first place?  Then the act of love becomes a duty and not out of love.  The truth is that very often there was no marriage at all because there was no free will on the part of those getting married. The marriage can be arranged by others but the free will must be there on the part of both getting married or it is not a marriage made in Heaven. 



Moral Errors on the Right and on the Left



The very reason I am writing this document is because of some of the actual statements I have heard right here in Fatima.  I felt that this false thinking must be confronted and answered or many people will continue to go to Hell for sins of the flesh.  I am not making these statements up but have heard them right here in Fatima, mostly by Americans, English and Irish and not be the Portuguese but this false thinking must be somewhat universal.


Errors on the left:

1.     I do not think God would judge people as sinning when they live together in love even if they are not married. 

2.     Love is everything and if one loves then the very act of love cannot be wrong even outside of marriage.

3.     I have a clear conscience and a great relationship with God and Our Lady.  (living with a girl and not married)

4.     Sex is as natural and as needed as eating and God would not want us to be unnatural. 

5.     The body generates sperm in a cycle like ovulation and must be released.  No one can be celebrate. 

6.     God would not want us to bring into the world a child that we cannot take good care of.

7.     The Church no longer teaches that masturbation is a sin.

8.     There is nothing wrong with two people of the same sex loving each other.  Who are we to judge them?

9.     If you are in love and going to get married, there is nothing wrong with making love.


 Errors on the right:

1.     Sex (act of love) is for children and not for lust.

2.     Sex (act of love) is always somewhat sinful.

3.     One should never look at a beautiful woman or good looking man as this is sinful.

4.     Sex (act of love) should not be a daily thing like eating and sleeping.   

5.     God was not in my first marriage but this second one is true love.  God would not want me to be without love.


Results of the above Errors:  

1.     It was alright when we were young but now it is just a job I must do. 

2.     Every act of love makes me feel like I should go to confession.

3.     Sex?  No big deal!

4.     My wife (husband) does not show me any love anymore.

5.     We have no romance in our lives.

6.     He (she) does not even notice me except in bed.


Answer to Errors of the Left


Error 1.  "Now the works of the flesh are plain, fornication (immorality), sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, anger, selfishness, dissension, party spirit, envy, drunkenness, carousing and the like.  I warn you, as I warned your before, that those who do such things shall not inherit the Kingdom of God.  But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control, against such there is no law."  Gal. 5:13-25 


Since fornication puts someone in Hell forever and ever, how can you say you love someone who you are condemning to Hell for ever and ever and ever?


Error 2. Any act out of place is a sin, just as if a un-baptized person went to Communion without knowing or even wanting to know the laws of God.  Love is not love unless it is an educated love with great thought and a permanent love.  Who can say they love if they are not willing to make it permanent in marriage and before God? 


Now notice that the first of the sins of the flesh is immorality which is fornication or the sexually impure.  Any act of sex outside the sacramental marriage bed is fornication, whether masturbation, sex with a prostitute, with someone we say we love,  homosexual sex or any form of porno sex, visual or actual.  Living together without marriage is always a sin and the fires of Hell await anyone who does not repent of this sin.


God is love and we all seek God but in seeking we look at humans and we mistake our need of love of God for a need of love from humans.  Love is not what we get but what we give.  God gives love and we should give love but what we seek is people to love us instead of loving them.  We do not understand love so we think love is what we feel in the flesh and therefore when we find someone who makes us feel good in the flesh we think this is love.


Error 3.  You may have a clear conscience and a good relationship with God but God does not have a good relationship with you, for He says that if you love Him, keep His commandments.  Anyone who does not keep the commandments of Her Son, is not a child of the Virgin Mary.  Revelation 12:17  


Error 4.  Sex is natural but it is generated in the mind, and if we keep the mind on purity then no lust is generated.  What may be natural to animals is controlled in civilized humans for we are called to control and subdue nature so that we can become super-natural. 


Error 5.  Sperm, which is what this man is talking about does not generate in the body without the help of the mind and if the mind is on purity then no lust is generated in the body and the body remains pure.  This error is an insult to Christ, Mary, Joseph, 2000 years of priests and nuns and it is an insult to me. 


Error 6. All God wants from this world is souls to live and love Him forever and ever and for this reason he made love a drive and the act of love a pleasure.  Those who want the pleasure and not give to God His souls are thieves and violate the tabernacle of Creation, the Womb. 


Error 7. This in fact is one of the greatest of sins against the flesh as it violates oneself, the natural law and the law of God.  Let no one be fooled - this act of masturbation is not natural.   If it was natural all this porno would not be needed throughout the world.  Porno magazines and books, porno video and audio, porno web sites and porno chat rooms have only one reason to help someone do what is not natural.  If it is natural why all the artificial stimulations?  Because lust is generated in the mind.


Error 8. I do not judge, God judges.  It is my job to pass on the words of God.  God calls this a great sin so should I say that God is wrong.  If I am silent about the words of God, God will hold me accountable for my silence.


Error 9.  If you are in love and are going to get married then you should respect the consummation of the marriage as being part of the marriage act.  If you have consummation before the Sacrament, what do you then call the act of love after the marriage promise?  If in fact, you are willing to give yourself outside of marriage even to the person who you will marry, why should I trust you to be faithful to me or me to you since we were not even faithful to each other?  Braking the rules of God brakes all the other things that gives love meaning, reverence, nobility, sacredness, awe, and birth of a child outside of marriage.


Answer to Errors of the Right


Error 1.  In the semantics of the word "Lust" this woman is correct.  For "lust" is an excessive, immediate or ruthless desire for the satisfaction of the sexual act.  However, I know that this women means something else.  She believes that any pleasure in the marital act is a weakness and it should be just for the bringing forth of children and this is wrong.  First of all the physical act of love is not even possible unless some form of desire is not generated in the mind or by touch.  It is quite obvious that the birth of a child could not happen unless at least the male received some satisfaction of his desire and without the desire he could not act. The false idea in the middle ages that a women should not even want to enjoy sex is refuted by Saint Paul, himself, in 1 Cor 7:1-5.  Here he is not only recommending marriage for satisfaction of desire but commanding both the  man and the woman to satisfy that desire lest one or the other be tempted to sin - "lest Satan tempt you for your incontinency (abstinence)."   He tells a husband not to refuse the wife and a wife not to refuse the husband.  Does this sound as if the wife should not enjoy the act of love?  Only among Moslems have I heard such nonsense and if I told you their extremes you would get sick.


Error 2. Nothing God creates is sinful.  In fact, in the context of a Sacramental Marriage, the act of physical love is sacred.  If one thinks of something sacred as sinful, God help his corrupted soul.  Those who have defiled love in the past may have lost their ability to love at all and so should stay away from such a great and sacred thing. 


Error 3. For a man to look at a woman with lust is sinful and for a woman to look at a man with lust is sinful.  But was Isaac sinning who found Rebecca beautiful to look at?  Was Abraham sinning who married Sara, of whom it is said she was so beautiful that she caused Abraham some dangers.  How does one find a husband or a wife if one does not look.  There is nothing wrong with looking providing lust does not enter into the mind.  Keep the eyes on the beauty and not on sins of the flesh and there is nothing wrong with looking.  This is not true of those who have already married.  I am here only talking of those who are not married and are looking for the right person.  They cannot find if they do not seek and they do not seek who do not look. 


Error 4. Love is not a Sunday thing, just as faith is not a Sunday thing.  Love is each and everyday.  Not everyday can one express his or her love anymore than one can eat when one is sick but as St. Paul commands one should always be ready to love and to give as may be wanted by one's love.  At long as you think of it as giving love and not taking love it will never grow old or into a job to do. 


Error 5. God will not recognize a second marriage for any reason.  If, in fact, the first was a true marriage, there is no such thing as a second marriage unless one of those married dies. 


Results of Errors


1. When you treat physical love commonly the results are that you will grow bored with it.  It demands special treatment with special circumstances as all holy things demand.  When you treat holy things commonly, you become bored with them, but this is your sin and not the sin of the holy thing.  Conjugal love between a man and a woman is a sacred act because God uses this act to create souls and He has created the greatest soul in history from a man and woman who were past the age of giving birth.  Since they thought they could not give birth, why were they still making love?  


2.  Treating the act of love as a sacred thing where you not only give of yourself but you want to give and not take leaves a since of satisfaction but when you are using something sacred for your own lust, you will and should feel a sense of sin, because you, in fact, have sinned. 


3.  I do not like Lobster anymore because for four years I could get all I wanted for free and I treated such a great thing as something common and overdid it without the respect it should have had.  No Faz mal! No big deal! This is the result of treating anything God created as nothing special.  Dignified people even treat eating as dinning and they enjoy it more than those who eat at the kitchen sink. 


4, 5, and 6.  When a girl is just in love for the first time, she prepares herself for the next meeting with her love and presents herself the best way she can with all the dignity and feminine beauty she can put together.  She shows her love that he is the only thing she is interested in at that moment.  The same happens with the man.  But as time goes on she expects that he will continue to love her even though she no longer treats his presence with any reverence or dignity.  She treats him commonly and he then treats her commonly and they both wonder what happened to the love.  Learn reverence to God and you will learn how to treat others and then they will love you and will never tire of loving you.    


Rick Salbato